Not good, Not fine

This winter has been the most torturous one that I’ve had to deal with. It’s neither because of the weather nor because of any other inconvenience usually caused during these times. The winter simply puts me in a hibernation mode were sitting at home was the only option to choose from. I was ecstatic at first when I had the opportunity to sit at home and read, eat and sleep. A perfect time to get your shit together, some might say. And I read, I cooked, I hogged, I slept, I watched television, I painted. Even after all that, the past couple of weeks has been tough for me. My brain badly wants me to leave the house and go somewhere far away but my mind doesn’t want to meet or interact with any humans. The last couple of weeks, I feel like there is a colossal rock sitting right on the centre of my heart. And the fear is that the moment this rock is turned or removed, I’ll bleed to death. Too much pain for something I’m very much unfamiliar with.

SO what do I do about it? I constantly make sure to occupy my mind with a book, a cooking recipe on YouTube or I simply get entertained by Bigshot’s dance. However, this solution has been a temporary one because the moment I close that book or get my head out of YouTube or when Bigshot leaves for the office, the pain starts throbbing again. I try to stay positive and think about everything I’m grateful about, but nothing seems to hold my castle in the air. There are issues that need to be dealt with and things that need to be fixed, but it’s going to take time. The patience to wait for something to get better is what I need right now. Patience is something we lack as much as we claim to envy it or strive for it. Why aren’t we patient enough to get better? Why aren’t we patient enough to wait for a better time? Why do we always look for happiness at the snap of a finger? Isn’t happiness worth the wait?

The buildup of plaque in the penile arteries order cialis professional may also reduce pain. VigRX Plus has tadalafil soft tabs been designed by well being experts utilizing normal components such as Tribulus, damiana and Bioperine are ready to improve the functionality of the heart. Remember that sexual impotence is not a curable cialis where condition, but it can be palliated with certain oral ED drugs. The levitra on line risk of erectile dysfunction increases with the age. I’m unhappy for reasons I cannot comprehend, but that doesn’t mean I should push myself to be truly happy without finding out how to. The shortcuts that we take in life to be happy is always temporary and the first thing towards understanding true happiness is to understand the need to be patient. ‘The Sun shines at the darkest place’, is a quote which is like a breeze of fresh air for anyone suffocating. I’m ready to wait to be truly happy again, but I’m going to need to work for it. For starters, I need to leave this house every once in a while. I need to breathe some fresh air. I need to stop over-thinking and worrying about trivial stuff. I need to move on.

I know that this post may send a tail-wagging chirpy dog of depression but that is not the purpose behind why I wrote it. We are always trying to put up a smile and tell everyone we are fine. But the moment you say I’m not fine, you get a clarity on what to do next for your unhappiness. You can decide whether you want to stay being headstrong unhappy or you want to fight over it and attempt to be happy. It however, starts with you letting your guard down and accepting what is in front of you and trying to figure out a way out of it. Let the world know you are in a dark place, but the instant the Sun starts rising, make sure you get a good view 🙂