Crawling my way into Parenting

As I crawled my way out of the nursery at 4 o’clock in the morning with slippers on one hand and phone in another, so many things rushed into my head. One loud thought was “When did it come down to this?”. I mean don’t take me wrong I’ve a 8 month old whom I love to my core existence but when did I become this night crawler who looks like they are about to hunt down a deer in the distant sight. I’ll tell you when. When I started sleeping again like a human at night.

The first six months after my son( can’t believe I’m saying it) was born, sleep was never proper. By proper I mean it did not exist. He wanted to be held till he felt safe to sleep in the crib. Which usually happened somewhere around 5 in the morning when your sleep has shown you the middle finger and waved you goodbye. I’ll be honest here. Life without sleep was torturous and exhausting. Not to forget, I was the most irritated self for a long time. I remember looking in the mirror and getting scared of the person who was frowning back at me. Now that Bigshot and I have started to sleep train our boy, I’ve been sleeping 6 hours in total at night and it has been good again. I don’t need sunglasses anymore to look at the morning light or scream my lungs out when I get out of the house during the day or continuously tear up when I’m doing normal routine activities. Also, l’ve become nicer towards people, even to those who ask why I look tired.

Initially when l got back my sleep schedule all I wanted was to go book an appointment with our pediatrician and fall on her feet, kiss her till she was creeped out. Because she was the one who gave us the confidence and the nudge to start sleep training. But as I was accustomed to zero sleep at night, I used to wake up after 3 hours of deep sleep feeling fresh and energized. Eventually everything came back to being normal and my sanity was reinstated.
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This is the time I tell you why I haven’t been writing for the past one year. I was sleep deprived for half that period and the rest of the six months I went into pregnant hibernation mode where all I did was eat everything I craved, read whatever I wanted, napped till I felt exhausted and shopped for baby clothes and everything else till Bigshot and I couldn’t afford anything anymore. Seriously, we are broke.  Even though there were many crazy and frighting incidents this last year, 2018 undoubtedly has been the best year of my entire life. 2018 will never have to compete with any of the coming years because no matter whatever happens Riaan was born on the summer of June 2018 and that for us will always be the best thing to have happened to us.

He drives us crazy sometimes (most of the time), but that’s what being a parent does to you. You do things you swore will never do for someone else, but here you are, cleaning up after your baby’s poop, catching his vomit before it falls on the carpet and sucking on his boogie when he has a congested nose. You even crawl in the middle of the night after a night feeding session hoping your hand and leg would coordinate better in making bigger steps to take you out of the nursery all the while making sure it doesn’t make a creaky sound on the wooden plank. I’m a parent now. Like I always say, with great power comes great responsibility, or was that Spider-Man?